What is a good man?

By Charl Human 

Micah 6:8

1Tim.4;8

Gal.1: 10

Most of the people God used to build His kingdom and spread His message were flawed, imperfect, and constantly failing individuals.

Thomas was a doubter. 

Peter was a liar.

David was an adulterer. 

John the Baptist was crazy. 

Paul was a murderer.

And through this, through their stories of imperfectly following God, I discovered good men aren’t perfect men. Being a good man isn’t the absence of failing; instead, it’s the determination to decide, and keep on deciding, to get up and continue on. 

For a long time, I’ve wrestled with this notion of what a good man is and how I can become one. Eventually, when it was evident the modern world didn’t have the answers, I turned to the Creator of men to see if maybe there, in His words, I could find a more satisfying and complete picture of who I was trying so hard to become. I went through history and looked at the men who made a positive difference in the world, and I looked at the men in my own life who I considered to be good men. Then I began piecing together a new image of what a good man might truly be.

What I found in my search was a whole new image of what this man looks like. 

Each man I looked at—whether from the Bible, history, or my own life—was very human. He struggled and failed. He had broken places in his heart and mind. Some were physically weak, and others fought addictions and moral failures. They didn’t look alike; some had beards and low voices, some were clean shaven (crazy, I know), and some couldn’t speak at all.

So often in Scripture I found that what makes a man is not his outward appearance but his inward heart position. His desire and dedication to pursue (even imperfectly) attributes that mimic God Himself, including unconditional love, generosity, wisdom, forgiveness, the list goes on. God says in the Old Testament, “Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart” (1 Samuel 16:7).

This more elusive but authentic image of a good man is a far cry from the destructive and often toxic image of the “modern man” we have come to know. But that image is one we ought to leave behind in order to take up a new one—a better, truer one.

Lets have a look over the next couple of days of what this man should look like.

 _Have you ever felt the desire to be a good man, to live for something greater than yourself and be a part of an epic story? If so, when do you first remember feeling this?

Identity

By Charl Human

Gen.2:19-20

Rom.12:1-2

When Adam was created, he was given a unique gift from God. This gift would help him carry out the task that God would give him.

Genesis 2:19-20 (NIV)

19 Now, the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the wild animals and all the birds in the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. 20 So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds in the sky and all the wild animals. But for Adam no suitable helper was found.

God created legions of animals. However, each animal was lacking the same thing - its name. Every day, God would bring a group of animals to Adam, and Adam would use his gift of giving identity to each creature.

Each creature presented itself before Adam. Perhaps Adam contemplated, and then he would create a unique name for each animal, be it giraffe, squirrel, or tiger. You see, Adam's gift was giving identity to others.

The other animals were back on the farm, so to speak, and if they could talk, they would say, "What's your name?” and they would have to say, "I don't know. The man hasn't named me yet."

You could tell there was an identity crisis on earth, and Adam was the solution to this crisis.

You see, as a man, you have a unique gift to give identity to those around you. You can encourage the men around you: “Great job.” “You're creative, innovative, and reliable.“ Take a moment. When was the last time you heard a man tell you something positive about yourself? If you can remember, how did you feel? Usually pretty good. Giving identity to others is also a critical gift to use in your marriage and family.

Your wife has a special place in her heart that only a husband can speak into. I have trained thousands of men to praise and speak identity into their wife. It's incredible how responsive a wife is to her husband when he consistently gives her praise and identity based on her positive attributes.

Your sons and daughters crave you giving them identity and praise. One of my major take-aways from my experience as a psychologist is this: If a man or woman had a great dad telling them they are capable, smart, gifted, loved, and special, their souls were much more resilient in any circumstance than a man or woman whose father did not intentionally give identity or praise to their child. That person aches for love as identity and is less resilient or confident in life.

As men, God created you to give identity to those around you. I encourage you to speak life to those around you. Use the gift God gave to you.

To learn more about the identity of man, CLICK HERE to watch Dr. Doug Weiss' "Men Make Men" video.

First Lesson

By Charl Human

1 Cor.6;19-20

Phil.2;9-11

Acts.17:26

I want to go back to Genesis 2:16-17: “And the Lord God commanded the man, ‘You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die.‘”

We are free, but with boundaries. Here God was establishing that He alone is God. Adam’s first lesson is that he cannot be his own god. Every man has to truly learn that we are not God but servants of the most high. We live in His house. We obey His guidelines, and we suffer consequences when we think we can make up the rules or do as we please without consequences.

Remember, the story of Adam is a story where God is the central character. God imagined man, created man, breathed into man, provided for man, led man and created a world of dependence on God to live without the consequences of God.

These boundaries are for our own good. God gets no pleasure when His son or daughter chooses a path they know not to travel and then has consequences for those journeys.

Living in a world where He is God, He is good, and He wants to lead us is a great world to live in. When we don’t believe in His word of ‘do this’ (worship Him) or ‘don’t do these’ (commandments, etc.), we set up a world where we decide what is good or evil for us.

I have counseled thousands who made the simple mistake of believing themselves, emotions, or hormones, and making decisions that they clearly knew were against who they knew God to be and His clear path.

As long as Adam lived in a dependent, obedient relationship with God, his life was much easier. When God gives us a boundary, it is like a loving father saying “Here is the way. Don’t do that; it will hurt you. I love you and want only the best for you.“

The lesson of “God is God” is a great lesson. The awareness that we live in a house He built, and this house has real boundaries for our own good, is a real lesson we can lean on - the story of God creating Adam.

You are free

By Charl Human 

Gen.2:16

Gal.5:1

2 Cor.3:17

I love the animal kingdom. There are so many familiar stories to us in that kingdom. I know most of you know about ducks. When they come out of the shell, they imprint and follow the first creature they see. Thankfully, that would be their mother and they learn to walk, swim and eat.

In Genesis 2:16, God said to Adam, "you are free to eat from any tree in the garden.” I want to focus on the first three words that Adam heard from the Father, "You are free." We, especially American Christians, would gloss over "You are free" without a second thought. We grew up in a free manner. Even today, some regions limit freedom for their citizens.

However, God never spoke these words to another creation in all eternity. "You are free" started a new chapter in the Father's book. He was giving humankind freedom for what we call free will. Adam could have freedom and use it as he wills.

Adam was the first to hear the words that he was free. God created us to be free from sin, poor choices, and the consequences of these behaviors. We were born free to obey the Father and walk in His ways instead of our ways. Thanks be to Christ, who paid the total price for all of our sins. The words "It is finished" give us back our freedom to choose His way over our own. Galatians 5:1 says, "It is for freedom that Christ has set us free". II Corinthians 3:17 says, "Where the spirit of the Lord is there is freedom."

We are created to be free, to decide, to choose. Our Father's heart is that we would use our freedom to choose His ways and His heart in the way we love and relate to those around us, including ourselves. He hopes we don't use our freedom to trap ourselves in continuous sins, lusts and behaviors that limit us.

Freedom is a great gift. Freedom was not free. It cost Jesus coming to earth, dying, and rising from the dead so we could choose His voice, ways, and heart in all matters and all relationships.

I pray we all appreciate this fantastic gift given to Adam and live totally restored in Christ. We are the most free people on the planet if we so choose to value and protect the freedom Christ alone has given to us.

Work

By Charl Human

Gen.2.15

Gal.6:10

Col.3.23

Eph.4:28

One of the fantastic things that separates humans from the animal kingdom is not only our opposable thumbs, it's the gift of work. We discussed earlier how there was a problem on the earth. There was no man to "work" the garden.

All men and women are created for a task of some kind. Man's task is called work. Work was not a part of the curse of sin. Work was the original plan of God for all men to participate in on the earth. After the fall, the ground became cursed, and now work would be more challenging. We would have to work to eat, but work itself was not cursed.

Remember, Christ redeemed us from all curses. Work for a follower of Christ does not come from the attitude of "I have to work" but rather "I get to work." I get to serve. I get to show love in this practical manner. Work is a blessing in so many ways.

Work gives us a sense of accomplishment. Work can provide confidence, growth, and experience. Work can allow you to exercise your talents, lead others, and discover new methods. Work helps us solve problems, heal people, and contribute. Work can give us a community to minister and serve. Work grows us spiritually, emotionally, and mentally. Work is awesome.

A man with nothing to do can become funky or get in trouble easier than a man on a mission. Work, I believe, is pleasurable. I will never forget a line from a movie, Chariots of Fire, which was about an Olympic runner. He said, "When I run, I feel His pleasure." He was referring to God.

I believe when we work unto the Lord and try to serve Him through our work, we move toward our destiny. We find pleasure not only in work itself but also in hearing the Father's voice of "Well done, good and faithful servant." To hear well done, we must have "done" something.

I encourage you to emulate your attitudes and beliefs around work. Do you have a "get to work" attitude or "have to work"? Do you work to provide, or do you work to serve the King of Kings? Your mindset about work can affect many areas of your life. I find the happiest and hardest working men are those who believe work is a privilege. God created you to work, so enjoy this aspect of your creation with all your heart.

Brought to the garden

By Charl Human

2 Tim.2:15

Jer. 29:11

Jer. 1:5

Gen. 2:8

Interestingly, if I were to ask you where was Adam created, almost everyone would respond, "In the garden." I want to share with you that this is not true. Adam was not created in the garden, which is important to understand spiritually.

Genesis 2:8 states, "Now the Lord God had planted a garden in the East, in Eden and there He put the man He had formed."

I have never heard this verse preached on, but I think this is a significant point in the creation of Adam.

Based on the scripture, Adam was made somewhere other than where Adam was given life. Adam's form was created but not in the garden. He also wasn't miraculously transported to Eden.

God created Eden and brought the man there. God has created a place, a destiny for just you, your Eden built by God. We arrive in our Eden only by following God. He holds our hand, leads, and knows where we are going - and we don't. Like sheep, He leads us to our still waters. Realizing this is a significant part of maturing in Christ. He should be driving the car.

The other noteworthy part of this story is that it didn't matter from where Adam started but rather where he followed. You might have been abused, abandoned, or addicted. Your destiny is not dependent on where or in what soil you grew up. You might have come from poverty or privilege, uneducated or educated, spiritual or not spiritual, moral or immoral. God created your Eden for you, and you need to arrive only with your willing heart in His hand.

You are not your past addictions, choices, worst moments, mistakes, or any negative narrative you might have. God divinely created you! You have a destiny! God knows the plans He has for you, and they are good plans. He knows the way because He knows what Eden He is taking you to.

I rest in this - I have never had a five-year plan. God as my Father has led me beyond my ability to imagine. I am only holding a hand and following Him. Part of your creativeness is wrapped up in following Christ daily.

Structure first

By Charl Human

Mathew 6:24

Heb.12:1-11

Prov.12:1

I love the scripture of Genesis 2:7, "The Lord formed man from the dust of the ground." You can imagine, almost like a movie scene, where the dust starts swirling around and this magnificent masculine male form is created. This is Step One of God creating Adam, and after God created Adam's body, He "breathed into his nostrils the breath of life and man became a living being."

As a Psychologist, I feel blessed to have worked with thousands of men and women over the several decades of my career. I often use Genesis 2:7 to illustrate how God creates in our lives today.

I want to highlight that so many people want to immediately see a change in their lives without fully embracing a discipline that can bring about the change they desire. For instance, a person who wants wealth in the future embraces the discipline of tithing, saving, and investing regularly. I have seen God supernaturally breathe on a discipline, and in turn, people obtain wealth. I have seen this in health and marriages as well. If a person embraces better eating habits and exercise, then he or she will become healthy over time. I've seen thousands of couples embrace sharing their feelings, praising each other and praying together, and thus reunite broken marriages.

Embracing self-discipline is a significant part of us growing in Christ. We can embrace a discipline or structure, like praying and reading the word of God daily, and over time we grow spiritually. We can practice patience, kindness, or any fruit of the spirit daily and find we have more of that fruit daily.

I want you to take a moment and ask yourself: "What are my structures?"

Are they spiritual? Or physical? Are they more intertwined with secular media and relationships OR are you consuming the word of God and investing in Godly relationships? Rarely do we, as western Christians, stop for even ten minutes and evaluate what we are creating in our life and future.

The secret is how you spend your time other than work and sleep. What you're doing with your time are your structures or disciplines that can bring blessings or challenges into your life. Today take a few minutes to answer this question of what you are creating and breathing your energy into. If you need to make changes, the Holy Spirit can help you move toward disciplines that pertain to your destiny.

The Solutions Take Time

By Charl Human

Gen.1:1-31

Gen.2:7

Previously, we established that you are a solution, medicine, or resource that will help solve a problem on earth. Lets dive deeper into how Adam was created and how God specifically created you.

In Genesis 1, there is a repeated phrase of God’s saying, let there be __________ and __________ would appear. You get the idea. God would speak it, and "bang!!" it was. This was true except for man. God did not say, "let there be man," and man was. Genesis 2:7 states, "and the Lord God formed man from the dust of the ground and breathed in his nostrils the breath of life, and man became a living being."

Man was the only being that God touched and shaped into His own image. Man is the only one God breathed into, giving life. God handcrafted you. You are His masterpiece. He put His destiny and the DNA of Himself inside you as you took your first breath.

All of us have baby pictures. You look a lot different from what you looked like as a baby - just like an apple seed looks different from a grown apple tree.

The difference between a seed and a tree is time. The DNA of the seed doesn't change you. It just grows you into what you are to become. This process of "becoming" takes decades to unfold who you are. We all have this extraordinary DNA destiny inside of us that can impact our current circumstances.

We would be wise to apply the same principles of a seed to grow into our destiny while we are growing. Every seed needs four things:

Water

Light

Nutrition

Soil

As Christians, we need the water, the spirit of God, and the presence of God to keep us walking in the grace of God. We also need the light of God's word to mature us into our destiny. We also need nutrition and not just from food. We need to watch what we feed our soul and especially keep away from the unhealthy worldly junk that could be impacting our destiny. We need healthy, Godly nutrition. We also need good soil. I believe every believer needs the soil of a local church and community. This community allows us to grow steadily in Christ.

You are the solution. It will take time for it to manifest. Be diligent about water, light, nutrition and soil. You will eventually arrive, and you will and enjoy your journey!

There's a problem on earth

By Charl Human

Gen.2:4-8

Eph.2:10

John 13:35

Ps.139:14

The story of mankind doesn't start with man. The story of man begins with God. God is the center of all scripture, especially in chapters one through three of Genesis. In these chapters, God creates the heavens, separates waters, and creates vegetation and animals because of humanity but all before humankind's existence.

God is the one who imagined and created man. This is huge! We did not imagine and create ourselves. God Himself created us. We are His handiwork, His art, His sons and daughters. God provided abundantly for Adam and Eve before each was created. God also provided for us before we were created.

God protects us all - even in ways we may not recognize at first. I remember plowing snow in my truck, sliding on ice, and heading off an embankment. However, God placed a strong tree there years before to protect me from death or severe harm. I love how He provides.

All we ever need is ready for us. God creates in abundance and extravagance to meet the needs of our lives.

In Genesis 2:4-8, there is an interesting statement about God before he made plants or rain: "and there was no man to work the ground." You see, there was a problem on earth. There was not anyone to work in the garden.

Man was made as a solution, which means that you are a solution. The problem existed before God created you. You and I are solutions of some kind for the world. You are not an accident but a specifically-designed solution for a problem on the earth.

God has put the DNA of being a solution in us as Christian men and women. Then He sends us into time through our mother's womb and grows us into a solution that needs to happen on earth.

So many Christians doubt they were created to be a solution, but that is clearly what God was sharing in the creation of man. God created mankind to work in the garden.

I don't know what solution you are here for, but I know the three elements of why you're here:

A problem existed before you.

You are part of the solution.

It will involve hard work!

Resolve to change your expression

By Charl Human

2 Cor..3;18

The outside expression of your life tiesup with the health of the inward development of your heart. I’m not speaking of your organic pump for pushing blood through your body. I’m speaking of your values, your spirit, your emotional connection with Christ. It is in the development of your love relationship with Christ that the outside man connects with the inside of a man, and eventually a life change for good occurs.  

People see it. You see it. However, even though the fruit we express is a byproduct of abiding in Christ and is supernatural, a certain amount of discipline with our commitment to release this new life to others is required. In the early stages, we tend to not trust with abandonment the new wisdom God anoints us with, and it is easy to fall into some old ways of thinking, acting, talking and reacting. For this reason, we should be conscious of our words and perspectives when we speak, and to make a sincere effort to speak words that edify and encourage.   

I have found that being disciplined and resolute to be synonymous with taking action. I have also found that being a disciple and living with the disciplines that a teacher taught, to be synonymous with a disciple. So we need to realize that the way we represent Christ who is in us is important. To be a disciple of Christ is to allow our relationship with Him to impact every aspect of our life on the inside and on the outside. When we allow Him to work in us in this way, life change at the surface will follow. There is a cause and effect that occurs.  

As much as we are resolutely committed to allowing Him to take us forward it is His resolute, unwavering commitment to help us find the new life we seek. This encourages me to tell you to allow Him to lead you where He will, for at the end of the day He will lead you where you sincerely desire to go. This is how your life will continually conform to His image, and that is a good thing.