The myth: "You must chase your dream"

Luke 22:42

Isiaha 55:1-3

I finished three strokes off the pace in this year’s Illinois Amateur Open. Three strokes! Do you know what that means? I’m on the verge of breaking through! My swing coach says everything about my game is in balance right now. And he’s not a guy who gives compliments lightly. I’m so close to seeing my dream of becoming a golf pro a reality.

I just wish someone else around here shared my excitement. My father-in-law certainly doesn’t. Last week he told my wife that she’d married a bum. He’s very traditional, and he has trouble with the fact that his daughter has the stable job in our household. I work, too. It’s just that I can’t really pursue a career because my focus is on my sport. So I work a job that has a lot of flexibility. I do make money, but most of it goes toward swing coaches, equipment, tournament fees, and things like that. Yes, it’s expensive, but those are the sacrifices you have to make if you want to live your dream.

My wife is on board—for two more years, at least. When we got married, I asked her for seven years to give me a chance to pursue my dream. (Actually, I asked her for ten, but she said she’d only give me seven.) I told her that if I didn’t make pro by then, I’d settle down and find a real job.

That was five years ago. And I’ve made incredible progress since then. I figure I’m so close now that my wife won’t mind giving me another year or two if I need it. After all, this is my dream.

The Truth

How about you? Do you have a dream—a passion that drives you, an interest that you pursue with all the time and resources available to you? It’s not a bad thing—unless it becomes a god. Do you ever wonder whether your dream might be interfering with God’s will for your life? Check out the following suggestions. You’ll find that the ones at the top of the list are non-threatening, for the most part. The ones at the bottom, however, will require some tough decisions on your part.

• Spend time thinking about Jesus’ words of submission to God in Luke 22:42: “Not my will, but yours be done.”

• Identify your real reasons for pursuing your dream. Be honest. Are you looking for personal fame, glory, or riches? Are you being driven by an unhealthy competitive streak? Are you running from something or avoiding something?

• Make a list of things you’ve gained and things you’ve lost in your pursuit of your dream.

• Ask friends, family members, and mature Christians whose opinions you value to evaluate your dream honestly. And listen to them.

• Read Isaiah 55:1–3. Is your dream centered around growing nearer to God? If not, do you really think that attaining your dream will bring genuine satisfaction?

• Ask God to give you wisdom, clarity, and boldness in assessing your dream.

• If your dream is preventing you from serving the Lord to the best of your ability, give it up. Consider it a sacrifice to God.

• If your dream is not honoring to God, ask him to give you a new dream—not only one that honors him but one you can pursue with the same passion you had when you pursued your previous dream.

The Myth: “I don’t have time for my kids because I have to work to provide for them

1 Tim.5:8

It’s got to be the oldest cliché in the world: Your kids will be grown and gone before you know it. I can’t tell you how many times people told me that right after my son Carter’s birth.

And, what can I say? They were absolutely right. All of a sudden, he’s eleven. And my baby girl is six.

Every now and then there’s a lull. Things slow down. Not for long, just for a minute. But I wonder if maybe during those times God is giving us a chance to catch our breath. During those times, all of a sudden I start to notice things. I look at my kids and think, Wow, how did we get here so fast? Where did the time go?

And then I feel guilty. I know I need to stop fixing cars in the evenings and on weekends. It takes up just about all my free time. But then I think, Are you nuts? That extra income is paying for things we need. If I didn’t take on side jobs as a mechanic, there’s no way Carter could go to baseball camp in the summers or we could take vacations every year.

Am I the only one who feels this pressure? I don’t have time for my kids because I’m so busy working to provide for them.

The Truth

Most people realize that time is fleeting, and they need to spend time with their kids now—before their kids are grown and gone. But often financial pressures make it difficult to juggle work and family commitments.

• Take a few moments to read and ponder 1 Timothy 5:8, a verse that spells out our financial responsibility in crystal-clear terms.

• Review your budget (with your wife if you are married). Are there areas where you can adjust your spending, so you don’t feel as much financial pressure? Try to come up with three things you could do to cut your spending so that you don’t have to work so hard just to keep your head above the water.

• Think through this statement: “I have a tendency to confuse my wants with my needs.”

• Is there a way to adjust your hours so you are available to spend time with your kids when they are still awake and home from school?

• Consider this: We really only have about an 18-year “window” with each of our kids. These are the premium years in which we will have the best chance to connect with them, to teach and guide them, and to impart our values to them. Ignoring this reality is foolish; failure to seize this opportunity will one day fill us with regret.

• If your work requires long hours, prayerfully consider other employment options. Radical? No question. But be open to change.

The Myth: “I honestly don’t have time for serious spiritual commitments right now.”

Ps.39:4-6

Ps.90:10,12

James 4:14

There’s this guy at our church named Barry. He’s a really great guy. I admire him because he’s always helping out at church, volunteering for things. This morning he calls to ask me to consider joining his Tuesday morning discipleship group. It sounds like a good group of guys, but they meet super early—like 5:45 a.m. at the church. Barry brings breakfast, and then they all go through some book discussion and pray together, and they’re done by 7:15. It gives everybody time to get to work.

I think this is probably the third time he’s called in the last year or so, asking me to help with something or join some group. And while I know I should get more involved, I keep putting him off. I feel that my life is just crazy right now. Work is stressful. I get home late a lot of nights and feel just whipped. Plus my house is old, and something always needs to be fixed; I’m constantly doing home improvement projects. But what really holds me back is that I’m divorced, and I get my kids half the time. That’s hard because when they are with me, I feel like I have to drop everything else.

So, I think I have to tell him I just can’t commit to it right now. Maybe I’ll have more time in a few months. The start of the school year is always so busy. I do want something like this, I just don’t know how to fit it in.

The Truth

Life is crazy and busy for most guys. Often it’s hard to know what to prioritize, which options are good, and which are best. One very dangerous excuse about cultivating a deeper relationship with God is that “one day I’ll get around to it.” Don’t bet on it. It’s not likely to just happen without effort on your part. “Urgent” responsibilities and “good” opportunities expand to fill all your available time. They have a tendency to crowd out the important and the best ones. It’s imperative to establish your priorities and then ruthlessly make time to pursue them. Here’s some practical help:

• Look at how you spent your time over the last six months. Review your personal calendar. What would an objective person observe and conclude about your priorities in life from your schedule?

• Browse through your most recent credit card statement. What do your expenditures reveal about your spiritual commitment?

• Realize that nobody stumbles or wanders into a healthy spiritual state. A life that honors God is chosen, carefully monitored, and pursued. You will never get there if you don’t make the decision and then take the necessary steps.

• Contemplate some Bible verses that speak about the brevity of life. For example Psalm 39:4–6; 90:10,12; James 4:14.

• If you’re not in some kind of small group, Bible study, or accountability group, find one and get involved. We all need the healthy accountability of other believers, a fellowship of strugglers. Such a group is like a safety net—a reminder of what matters most.

• Some of the hardest decisions we make in life are not between good and evil—they are between good and the very best. Are you using your time in the very best way?

The Myth: “Christians don’t need to care about social justice.”

Lev.19:9-10

Luke 12:33

Ezekiel 22:23,-31

Prov.19:17

Prov.28:27

The person with the sign was standing at the corner on my way to work again today. It’s not always the same person, but the signs are basically the same: “Unemployed vet. Please help.” Or “Children need food. Any amount will help!” I ignore them. They are probably just out to scam the gullible people driving by.

I know the Bible talks about helping the poor, but I don’t think that applies to these people with the signs or the homeless people I see wandering downtown. Those people just need to take a shower and go get a job. Or get off their drugs.

I don’t actually say that out loud, but I think it. And yeah, I know there are some pretty desperate cases out there. People with legitimate needs. Mentally ill or disabled people who can’t work. They do need help. And even though I’m not a big believer in the idea that the government is supposed to solve every problem in society, that is what our taxes should go toward. And they do. I know that there are lots of ways that poor people get help. There are food pantries and government payments for rent. So most of the poor people don’t need my money.

I recently read about a new inner-city ministry that is trying to reach out to needy people. I’m glad somebody wants to do that. It’s not something I feel called to do.

The Truth

When the heavenly kingdom comes, the Bible teaches that everyone will have plenty, and life will be good for all. Until then, in our fallen world that has rejected God’s rule, people will suffer from the effects of sin. What is our responsibility to those in need? Can the people of God look the other way when we see real needs?

• Read Leviticus 19:9–10. Why do you think God included this among the laws for the nation of Israel?

• Jesus told his followers to give to the poor (Luke 12:33). What are some practical ways you can live out this command?

• God allowed the people of Israel and Judah to go into captivity because they turned away from him and mistreated the vulnerable in their midst (Ezekiel 22:23–31). When you think about justice, can you identify what structures are in place in your society that oppress the poor? How can you educate yourself about poverty in your community? Talk to someone who works with under-resourced people and get some book or blog recommendations so you can learn more about helping others.

• Read and ponder advice from the book of Proverbs (19:17; 28:27; 29:7).

• God has special concern for three groups of people: foreigners, widows, and orphans (Exodus 22:21–24). Use a concordance or online concordance to find all the places in the Bible where God tells his people to care for these groups. Now ask yourself how you can show your care for foreigners, widows, and orphans in your community.

• Volunteer your time. Does your church or community have any ongoing outreach to under-resourced people in your area? Why not commit to helping for a certain amount of time?

• Carefully consider your financial support for trusted organizations; do your research before you give. Make sure you are helping and not hurting those most vulnerable.

The Myth: “The purpose of church is to meet my needs.”

Mark 10;45

Acts 20:35

1 Peter 4;10

Eph.4:10

I’ll admit it. I’m a little bit disgruntled. 

 I’ve been going to my church for four years, and I’ve actually been regular in my attendance. I’ve participated in some of the activities—men’s fellowship group and the sports leagues. It’s okay, I guess, but honestly—I don’t get much out of it.

Now I hear that there’s a new church being built about two miles from our house. It’s huge. The auditorium looks like it will seat about 4,000 with state-of-the-art audio/video. And they’re building a family life center that’s going to rival the best health clubs in town.

I was over there with my son the other day, just walking through the construction site, checking it out, and one of the staff members came by. We struck up a conversation, and he told me about the different programs they already have going on at their other location. It was pretty impressive. The new building will have a bookstore, coffee shop, and fitness classes (with childcare). Anyway, I thought it was providential that he happened to come by right then. Maybe God is trying to tell me something.

I’m wondering if that church would be a better fit for me and my family.

The Truth

We live in a consumer-oriented society. Merchants are clamoring to get our attention, impress us, and earn our patronage by offering us the “best deal” for our money. So it’s hard not to approach our church experience in the same way. Like a kind of religious shopping mall, individual churches advertise their “goods and services,” subtly (or not so subtly) spelling out all the ways they are superior to the competition. Is this healthy? Is the church’s purpose to impress us and meet our needs?

• The great emphasis of the New Testament is that we have been saved to serve. Look at Jesus: “For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Mark 10:45). Think about how that mindset could change your approach to life.

• Jesus taught, “It is more blessed to give than to receive” (Acts 20:35). When it comes to being involved in your church, do you live as if you really believe that?

• We all have a part to play in the body of Christ. “Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms” (1 Peter 4:10).

• As we care for others, they care for us. When everybody serves, everybody gets served.

• God has made each of us for a unique purpose. Ephesians 2:10 tells us God has a tailor-made life plan for us. Serving is the path to personal fulfillment.

• Make it your goal to understand God’s purpose for the church. Use a Bible concordance (you can purchase one or there are free ones online) and look up passages in the Bible that refer to the church.

• Church isn’t about you and your needs; it’s about God and his glory. The sooner you realize that, the sooner you’ll start serving and giving and the sooner you’ll find the deep fulfillment you crave.

The Myth: “Nobody needs to know I struggle with... "

1 Cor.12:12-31

Isiaha 5:16

Eccl.4:9-12

Mark 14:32 -34

Okay, I realize it. I have some pretty serious issues with envy. I’m not proud of it. But I do.

One of my friends at church is an attorney. He’s a great guy, but seriously, he’s no smarter than I am. And yet he makes an enormous salary and lives in a huge house.

Another guy in my small group comes from a large and wealthy family. His family is so prominent in the community that he has all kinds of connections. So his real estate business is booming.

I could go on and on about people I know who enjoy all these advantages I don’t have. I try to be happy for them. And I try not to let it bother me. But I can’t lie; it does. Why did I have to grow up in a family without many resources? Why do I struggle to find a job that is fulfilling but also covers my bills?

I’m trying to deal with it, and I pray about it a lot. But the problem never goes away. In a sermon recently, my pastor talked about how important it is for us to admit our struggles. For me, that is never going to happen. Would I really admit being jealous of half the guys at church? Nobody needs to know I struggle with envy. That’s between me and God.

The Truth

If you live in the United States, you likely have been influenced by the idealization of the “rugged individual.” This notion, popularized in media and pervasive in the modern church, is the idea that people don’t really need others; people should do things themselves without the assistance of anyone else; anyone who admits a weakness is a failure; being in need is seen as a character flaw. But if we’re honest, we know that everyone has a unique set of struggles. Stuff. Issues. Call it whatever you wish. The point isn’t so much what specific problems you happen to be dealing with. The issue is whether you should be trying to handle those struggles by yourself.

• Rugged individualism may be a prevalent view, but it’s harmful to both individuals and society. Humans were created to function in community (see 1 Corinthians 12:12–31). God created the church for a reason. We do need others. And they need us. Every man needs a community.

• Take the risk of being open and authentic. There is great freedom and healing in naming and admitting our weaknesses and failures (see James 5:16).

• The great enemy of our souls—liar that he is—whispers into our hearts the scary pronouncement that if we admit our secret problems to others, they will abandon us, betray us, or regard us as sick and twisted. However, honest strugglers will find unexpected support and gain new strength.

• Replace your envious thoughts with grateful ones. When you find yourself envying another person, thank God for something he’s given you.

• Create a list of things you have that others might envy. While it’s easy to focus on what you don’t have, you likely have blessings that others envy.

• Don’t fight your battles alone. Read Ecclesiastes 4:9–12. There is undeniable power in numbers.

• Meet with a trusted friend regularly. Don’t put up a façade. Be real. Open up about what you’re struggling with and commit to praying for each other.

• There is no shame in asking for help, and it’s not unmanly to be scared. Remember Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane? Even Christ saw the need and the value of struggling in community rather than going it alone (Mark 14:32–34).

The Myth

Eph.4,:1-16

 “I don’t have a Christian calling because I have a regular job”

For the past few weeks, my pastor has been preaching about “finding your calling.” He’s been giving lots of examples of ways that people can serve God, such as through leading Bible studies or teaching Sunday School. He talks about how everyone has a calling from God. He’s talked a lot about his own “call story” to ministry, and he has been using lots of different “call stories” from the Bible for his messages: Moses, Gideon, Jeremiah, Peter, etc.

The thing is, I don’t think any of this really applies to me. I’m a pharmacist, and that’s pretty much it. It’s a decent occupation, but I don’t have the kind of vocation or Christian calling that my pastor keeps talking about. In my opinion, that’s fine. There are some people who are called to ministry vocations, like pastors. There are also people called in smaller ways, like lay elders and deacons. Those are people who have normal jobs but also still have time for a Christian calling on the side. And then there are those people who can lead Bible studies or small groups. That’s all great, and I’m thankful for all those people in my church. I think of them as the ones that God has “called.” But the rest of us aren’t in that boat. We just have normal jobs.

I actually wish my pastor would stop talking about our calling and Christian vocation. For one thing, it seems kind of out of touch. Doesn’t he realize that those words don’t apply to the majority of us? It seems narrow-minded to me. And the other thing I don’t like about it is that after a while it makes us, the “normal” people, feel guilty for being who we are: folks with regular jobs who aren’t called to some kind of ministry role. Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad that God calls certain people to do ministry. But those people should focus on simply doing ministry rather than talking about how I need to find my own calling.

The Truth

The fact is, God, calls all Christians to serve in his kingdom in all kinds of different ways. Indeed, one of the common Greek words in the New Testament for referring to Christians (kletos) literally means “those who are called.” God calls believers in all spheres of life to bring the message and truth of Christ into those places, whether that person is working in church ministry or at a pharmacy.

• Read Ephesians 4:1–16. Notice the ways Paul emphasizes the calling of each individual. Remember, Paul, is not writing to a group of pastors; he is writing to all Christians.

• Focus on just these verses: Ephesians 4:11–13. According to Paul, why does Christ give leaders to the church? How does this purpose connect to the calling and vocation of each church member?

• Consider how God might be calling you to serve him in your own life circumstances. This will look different for each person. God has put you in a certain place and given you a specific set of gifts and abilities. How can you serve God in your own context?

• Challenge yourself to think about your calling and vocation in broader ways. God calls people to many more things than preaching and leading Bible studies. Some people are gifted in serving, offering hospitality, spending time with the lonely, offering consulting, fixing things, providing childcare—and so many other ways. Broaden your idea of the ways God calls his children!

• Ask a pastor or trusted Christian friend what gifts or strengths they see in you. They might open your eyes to God-given gifts you don’t know you have yet! Knowing your gifts will help you discover your calling.

• It can be daunting to think about your calling. Remember, the same God who calls you is the God who equips you. Trust God, who has given you everything you need to bring him glory in the ways you serve him.

Moral Courage

1 Cor.13:16

I love how God repeatedly told Joshua to be strong and courageous when he was about to lead the Hebrew nation in their conquest of Canaan (Joshua 1:6-7, 9). But the truth is, he tells all of us to be strong and have the courage to do what is right.

Let’s quickly review. The six virtues of manhood we’ve looked at in these devotions so far have been tough love (sacrificing yourself for others), childlike wonder (never losing your desire to learn about God’s world), will power (that sanctified stubborn streak), raw passion (an infectious enthusiasm), true grit (the combination of passion and perseverance), and clear vision (knowing what you’re fighting for).

None of these are good enough without the final virtue: moral courage. “Courage is not simply one of the virtues,” writes C. S. Lewis, “but the form of every virtue at the testing point.”

Where does moral courage come from? From a conscience that is taken captive by the Word of God.

The conscience is our spiritual operating system—hardwired into the human heart—and it requires constant updating and upgrading. The way you do this is by downloading Scripture on a daily basis. When you study Scripture, you’re uploading God’s good, pleasing, and perfect will. Then you let your conscience be your guide—a conscience informed by the Holy Scriptures and fine-tuned to the still, small voice of the Holy Spirit.

If you violate your conscience consistently, it’s like a gauge that no longer gauges. But if you get into God’s Word and God’s presence on a consistent basis, your conscience learns to listen for and respond to the voice of the Holy Spirit. You may need to humble yourself, confess sin, stand up to wrong, come out publicly for Jesus—it depends. But if you do it, eventually you become a man after God’s own heart.

A man of conscience is a change agent—a force to be reckoned with. As Andrew Jackson observed, “One man with courage makes a majority.” He’s not blown here and there by trending winds. He’s anchored to the Word of God, and that anchor holds him through ups and downs, through thick and thin.

Listen to your conscience and follow its lead.

Play the man!

Where do you need to act out of moral bravery today?

Clear Vision

Mathew 11:12

I don’t know what version of the Bible you’re using to read today’s Scripture verse, but mine says that “violent men” take the kingdom of heaven “by force.” What a bold description! The first-century church had issues, just like the church does today, but they were full steam ahead. They had a clear picture of what they wanted—God’s reign—and they went after it.

The sixth virtue of manhood is a clear vision.

Men need something to fight for, something to fight against. It’s how we survive the storms that are bound to batter us now and then. Without a vision, a man will waste his life. But with a clear vision, he’s a force to be reckoned with.

Do you have a mission statement for your life?

What about a vision statement for your marriage?

How about core values for your family?

Or what about life goals or a life plan?

You can’t play the man without a vision any more than you can play piano without a piano or play football without a football.

I love the classic scene from The Blues Brothers when Elwood Blues announces: “We’re on a mission from God.” It’s a mission from God that keeps us on the straight and narrow. When we are busy with the Father’s business, we can’t be sidetracked. A mission from God not only motivates us to do the right thing, but it also demotivates us from doing the wrong thing.

If you aren’t on a mission from God, you aren’t really living—you’re dying. You aren’t just wasting your God-given potential, you’re wasting space. You’re dead weight.

You need a vision for a mission. Ask God to give it to you. Pray, fast, study—whatever it takes, don’t stop until you have your vision. Then write it down and never forget it or stop pursuing it with all the “violence” of your God-given determination.

What is your purpose for the remaining years God will give you on this earth?

True Grit

James 1:12

James talked about a single-minded stick-to-itiveness come hell or high water. In a word: grit.

That’s the fifth virtue of manhood. Grit is the place where passion and perseverance meet. It’s resilience in the face of rejection, fortitude in the face of fear. It’s a no guts, no glory approach to life, even in the face of impossible odds.

I certainly believe in the power of prayer. We must pray like it depends on God. But I also believe that a good old-fashioned work ethic honors God. So you have to work like it depends on you.

Even if you’re hanging on by a thread, you hang in there. No matter how many times you’ve been knocked down, you get back up! You keep on keeping on no matter what, no matter when, no matter how.

Today I want you to consider the idea that men should actually seek out situations where they’re going to have to activate their grit if they are going to accomplish anything.

Truth is, I’m more and more convinced that men need an element of danger. It’s one way we come alive. It’s one way we discover who we really are. Without danger, our sense of manliness atrophies. We become like caged animals. If there isn’t a healthy and holy outlet for our testosterone, we often find unhealthy and unholy outlets.

1 Cor 9:27 "But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified" ESV 

The way you gain strength is by breaking down your muscle fibers. Then, with the help of protein, those muscle fibers grow back even stronger. What’s true physically is true emotionally and spiritually. When you go through a season of stress, think of it as an emotional workout. It might feel like a breakdown, but God is building up your emotional fortitude! Maybe it’s time to set a stretch goal.

We must choose to do things that push us past our previous limits.

It takes tremendous grit to go after your dreams. It takes tremendous grit to fight for your marriage. It takes tremendous grit to be a true friend, a true father. But that is precisely the point.

It takes a man.

It makes a man.

Name today’s stretch goal. And go for it!

Raw Passion

Col.3:23

A literal translation of today’s verse could read: “Do it like your life depends on it.”

Playing the man means playing hard. It’s leaving it all out on the court. In other words, give it everything you’ve got. Don’t just make a living. Make a life. Don’t just earn a paycheck. Go after the passions God has put in your heart. Halfway is no way to live; you’ve got to go all in.

So here’s the fourth virtue of manhood—raw passion. It’s a lust for life that doesn’t settle for status or status quo. It’s an insatiable energy that motivates you to live each day like it’s the first day and the last day of your life. It’s an infectious enthusiasm that can come only from being filled with the Holy Spirit to overflowing.

The word enthusiasm comes from the Greek roots en and Theos, meaning “in God.” So the more you get into God, and the more of God’s Spirit that gets into you, the more impassioned you become.

When was the last time you got outside your comfort zone physically, spiritually, or relationally? You tell me the last time you were uncomfortable, and I’ll tell you the last time you grew! Growth only happens when we put ourselves into uncomfortable situations.

How about this example? Jesus may have been meek and mild, but He also had a wild side. He touched lepers, celebrated Samaritans, stopped storms, exorcised demons, ate with sinners, healed on the Sabbath, and turned funeral processions into parades. Then He died the way He lived—with pure passion. It’s no coincidence that the final week of His life is synonymous with passion—Passion Week.

When you follow in the footsteps of Jesus, His passion will refine you and define you. God doesn’t just crucify our passions; He resurrects them and uses them for His purposes!

Your challenge today!!!!!!

 What can you do today that will make you feel uncomfortable—and fully alive?

Will Power

1 Cor.10:23

In today’s Scripture verse the distinction between permissible and beneficial is the difference between good and great. Don’t settle for what’s permissible. That’s the path of least resistance. Go after greatness by going the extra mile!

The first and second virtues of manhood we looked at in these devotions were tough love and childlike wonder. The third is will power.

Will power means not my will, but “your will be done” (Luke 22:42). It’s a will that has been fully surrendered to the lordship of Jesus Christ. It’s a sanctified stubborn streak that refuses to compromise its convictions.

At a pastors gathering not long ago, Jack Hayford shared his secret sauce. It’s so simple yet so profound: Make decisions against yourself.

We want success without sacrifice, but life doesn’t work that way. Success will not be shortchanged. You have to pay the price, and it never goes on sale. The best decision you can make for yourself is making decisions against yourself. You have to discipline yourself to do the right things day in and day out, week in and week out, year in and year out. And if you do, the payoff is far greater than the price you paid.

Now let’s bring this idea down to earth for you. If you want to get out of debt, you’ve got to make decisions against yourself financially. It’s called sticking to a budget. If you want to get into shape, you’ve got to make decisions against yourself physically. Join the gym. If you want to grow spiritually, you’ve got to make decisions against yourself. Try fasting.

Of course, you could just let things go, keeping busy with whatever pursuits you’re comfortable with. And those things may not necessarily be wrong in themselves. They might be quite good. But if you want God’s best, you have to say no, not just to things that are wrong, but even to second best—whatever’s merely good instead of truly great.

What decision against yourself do you need to make today?

Childlike Wonder

John 4:24

We think of spiritual and intellectual pursuits as mutually exclusive endeavors, but they are one and the same. Great love is born of great knowledge. In fact, your knowledge is your worship ceiling!

Knowledge does not automatically translate into worship. But in some respects, quality of worship is determined by quantity of knowledge. The more you know, the more you have to worship. So that’s why the second virtue of manhood is a childlike wonder about the world.

I’m not advocating an intellectual feeding frenzy. After all, we already suffer from information overload. There is more information in one Sunday edition of the New York Times than the average person living in the Middle Ages would have consumed in an entire lifetime. I’m not convinced we need to know more, as much as we need to do more with what we know. That said, keep learning!

“Live as if you’ll die tomorrow,” said Mahatma Gandhi. “Learn as if you’ll live forever.” That’s a good rule of thumb.

According to the Pew Research Institute, half of adults read fewer than five books per year. And men read thirteen percent fewer books than women. I don’t know if you’re above average or below average, but five books a year doesn’t cut it. Especially since most men, myself included, average twenty hours of ESPN per week.

The most important law of ecology is this: L ≥ C. For an organism to survive, the rate of learning must be equal to or greater than the rate of change happening around them. With the rate of change escalating, we must learn faster, learn better, and learn more.

The word disciple comes from the Greek word mathétés. The root word means “the mental effort needed to think something through.” So by definition, a disciple is someone who never stops learning.

Faith is not mindless.

Faith is mindful.

Let’s be men who are driven by a childlike wonder to know as much as we can about as much as we can. Why? So we can worship God as much as we can.

What are you going to read today?

Tough Love

Luke 9:23

Take up your cross.

We say it so effortlessly, so flippantly. But that’s because we read it figuratively. It’s estimated that a Roman cross weighed three hundred pounds, and even if Jesus carried only the crossbar, it was still placed on raw flesh that had just been flogged! And He carried it no less than 650 yards down the Via Dolorosa.

In my book "Play the Man," I introduce seven virtues of manhood. I want to do the same in these  devotions. The first virtue is tough love. Here’s what I mean by that: Being a tough guy doesn’t mean sticking up for yourself when you get offended. A true tough guy sacrifices himself for the sake of others.

Jesus didn’t just carry a three-hundred-pound cross; He carried the weight of the world. Every offense ever committed was placed on His shoulders, and He carried it all the way to Calvary.

Tough love like this is far more difficult to attain than physical toughness, and far more important. It sets the men apart from the boys! A tough guy isn’t someone who can blacken an eye or bloody a nose; it’s someone who is willing to be nailed to a cross for someone he loves.

So let’s get it straight in our minds. Tough love is sacrificial love—a love that is willing to be nailed to a cross for someone else’s sin. Tough love is unconditional love—a love that is not dictated by someone else’s performance. Tough love is covenantal love—for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health.

If you’re married, it’s easy loving your wife when everything is going great, right? When it’s not going great, it’s not so easy. Why? Because our love tends to be reactive. Tough love is proactive. It’s not a need-seeking love; it’s a need-meeting love. It doesn’t seek validation, because it doesn’t need any! It adds value to the beloved.

That’s what it means to carry your cross. That’s what you’re called to.

So toughen up.

Play the man!

How can you show sacrificial love to another today, regardless of how tough it is for you?

The End Is In Sight

Rev. 21:1-27

The marathon runner crests the last hill and glimpses the finish line. His eyes widen while his frenzied heart beats even faster. His race is nearly done. So he shakes the sweat from his head, grunts as he accelerates and gives one last kick at the end—sprinting toward the finish line. What inspires such effort from someone so clearly fatigued? How can he muster even more energy when his lungs already burn? The prize at the end of the race makes each ache and every pain worthwhile.

Of course, the apostle John, now an old man, isn’t running any marathons. Yet inwardly his heart continues to race. Before him hangs the finishing tape of his apocalypse, the entire Bible, the Christian faith and history itself. Just across the finish line awaits the prize that makes every pain he’s endured worth it in the end. But what is the prize?

We might be tempted to conclude, “No more death or mourning or crying or pain” (Revelation 21:4). That’s the prize! Or we might posit, “The Holy City, Jerusalem” shining like “a very precious jewel, like a jasper, clear as crystal” (Revelation 21:10–11). We might expect that the prize is being reunited with our Christian friends and loved ones. While all of these are certainly treasures, however, a far greater treasure awaits, the one that confers value on each of these lesser prizes.

The treasure of heaven is God himself! He’s the prize we race after all our lives. God’s presence with his people wipes away their tears of mourning (see Revelation 21:3–4). God’s glory causes the city to shine (see Revelation 21:11). The glory of God illuminates the New Jerusalem and attracts the praise of the nations (see Revelation 21:23–24).

Imagine John returning to his daily life after catching a glimpse of God’s glory at the finish line. Do you think that, following that experience, he could yawn and then waste his time with the trivialities of this world? No! In his heart this aged saint had run the race of faith with incredibly renewed vigor and abandon. He had seen the prize.

By faith you can also gaze at the prize as you meditate on this portion of Scripture. Then run! Chase after the treasure of heaven—God himself!

What aspect of heaven excites you the most? Is it being with God and Jesus, or is it something else?

In Two Worlds at Once

1 Peter 1

Most of us inhabit at least two worlds. For example, we live in one world of home and family and another of work. We have other “worlds” too, like the burger joint where we grab a quick lunch before we move on to our next world.

Even in the first century the apostle Peter understood this concept. He makes frequent references to “this world” and “the eternal,” explaining that the way we respond to events in this life produces lasting effects in the eternal world, so that what happens here influences us there.

This shouldn’t be surprising. We know, for example, that a nutritious breakfast in the morning affects the way we approach the rest of our day. And we understand that despite our efforts to keep the worries of work from following us home, our family members can usually sense when we are preoccupied with our jobs. So it shouldn’t seem strange that the way we live in the physical world affects our experience of the spiritual world.

Notice how effortlessly the apostle connects these two worlds for us. He commends those who love Christ without ever having seen Him, for such faith leads to a life filled with “inexpressible and glorious joy” (1 Peter 1:8). He assures believers who successfully sustain fiery trials that they’ll enjoy invaluable faith as an outcome of this painful process (see 1 Peter 1:7). To Christians suffering persecution and other troubles, Peter promises a magnificent eternal inheritance (see 1 Peter 1:4).

Does that eternal, spiritual world seem distant to you? Or does Scripture’s portrayal of this profound reality motivate you to endure what otherwise might be too difficult for you to bear?

If you’ve been discouraged lately by opposition or setbacks in this life, give thought to the inheritance waiting for you.

What physical worlds (home and work, Sundays and weekdays) do you struggle to connect?