NOT TO BE SERVED, BUT TO SERVE

Mathew 20:28

Gen.12 :11-13, 17-19

Like Jesus, you are called to live in a posture of servitude, sacrificing your own comfort for the protection and integrity of those in your care. While Jesus shows us a prime example of what this looks like, a famous Bible character named Abram (later known as Abraham) shows us the opposite. 

When visiting Egypt, Abram devised a plan with his wife, Sarai, to lie to the Egyptians, that she was his sister and not his wife, from fear that he would be killed for her beauty so that she could be married to the pharaoh (Genesis 12:11-13). At first glance, this might sound like a wise idea. 

What Abram failed to realize was that in his efforts to preserve himself, he actually put Sarai, his wife, in danger. Abram left her in the hands of the pharaoh, who intended to marry her and then have her reject God to conform to the customs of the Egyptian land. Fortunately, God stepped in and protected her, letting the pharaoh know that Sarai was actually Abram's wife and not his sister (Genesis 12:17-19). In his effort to save himself, Abram lessened the identity of Sarai, from being his wife to his sister, making her available to be purchased by the pharaoh. 

As men, when we behave in ways that are self-centered and selfish, we fail to confirm the valued identity of those around us and even knock on the door of dehumanizing them. For example, when we watch pornography, we gradually solidify in our hearts that women are disposable and exchangeable objects of pleasure. When we are silent and complacent in response to the suffering of women and children in our society, we communicate with our inaction, that they are not worthy of our attention and active response.. 

May God have mercy on us and make us aware of the call to rise up and to be His hands and feet of purity, protection, and provision here on this earth.

START A PURITY OUTBREAK

Matthew 1:25

Ephesians 5:25-27

As a man, God calls you to lead in purity. This is simply presenting the discipline you practice privately, publicly, so that it positively affects those around you. Let's look again at Joseph. 

Joseph was instructed by an angel of God to go ahead and marry Mary, after receiving assurance that she was not disloyal to him and was actually impregnated by God Himself. After marrying Mary, Joseph abstained from sexual relations with Mary until Jesus was born (Matthew 1:25). 

Notice, Joseph is married to Mary and has legal and divine permission to have sexual relations with her. Instead, Joseph chooses to abstain, sacrificing his own satisfaction and pleasure to keep Mary and Jesus pure. We need the grace of God to get to this level of selflessness. 

If you are in a romantic relationship that has not yet graduated to marriage, the woman you are courting may not be pregnant with Jesus, but she is surely pregnant with purpose. If Joseph could lead in purity and abstain from having sex with his own wife to keep her pure for her divine assignment of giving birth to Jesus, then you have certainly been equipped with the grace to lead the woman you are courting and/or will court in sexual purity. 

As married men, we are called to sacrifice ourselves in whatever way is necessary for the benefit of our wives (as Christ gave Himself for the church). As married men, the call to live and lead in purity is one of the ways we give ourselves to our wives. This is why it's much better to start practicing purity before marriage than to have to learn while on the job. When our wives don't desire sex because they feel sick, tired, or are not in the mood, we should not hold it against them or guilt them into sexual submission. Rather, we ought to show patience and self-discipline by demonstrating unconditional love for them and concern for their needs. 

Married or not, sexual purity and discipline are a must!

Beware: Danger ahead

PUT THE SEX TOYS AWAY

Gen.2 : 16-17

Prov.5: 18-20

When God says, "here, you can have this," He expresses His love for us. When God says, "no, don't touch this," or "don't touch this right now," He gives us an opportunity to show our love for Him. Men love and respect God. Do you? Where's your evidence?

As men, we get into trouble when it comes to sex. God has given us the gift of sex, and we have the ability to use it the right way or the wrong way. It's simple, the right way glorifies God. If we use it the wrong way, we disobey God, misrepresent Him, and hurt ourselves. Sex is great. But when sex is done outside of marriage, there are physical and spiritual costs that don't seem like a big deal until the bill comes. It's like going to a restaurant and ordering everything that sounds good and the menu doesn't show the price of heartbreak, an unhealthy soul tie, or even an unplanned/unwanted pregnancy.  

To avoid such heart and head ache, God calls all men to walk in sexual purity. Although you may have access to things that produce lust in your heart, such as pornography, masturbation, and your imagination gone wild, God provides the grace to say, "no" to these illegitimate pleasures. When it comes to sex, God very seldom says "You can never have this," but when He does, in cases when he has called a man to lifelong singleness, He provides the grace needed to fulfill this expectation. For most of us, God simply says, "you cannot have this yet," as He desires to be glorified in our obedience and intends to protect our God-given sexual appetites for our wives when a marriage covenant has been made.

Security through maturity

John 8:4-5

Mathew 1:19

An immature man is a pain to society. Those who trust him are familiar with hurt and disappointment. Until we learn to be responsible and trustworthy, we are not even useful in God's hands. 

When Joseph, Jesus' earthly father, learned that his fiancee was pregnant, he was shocked. He probably suspected that Mary had been promiscuous during the period when she should have been keeping herself sexually pure for him. Joseph must have been deeply hurt, as any man would have been. Although he felt the marriage could not continue, Joseph determined in his mind that he would still protect Mary and the child. Rather than publicly disgracing her, as the religious leaders intended with the woman who was caught committing adultery (John 8:4-5), Joseph decided that he would break the engagement, "quietly" (Matthew‬ ‭1:19). Sometimes some situations will occur, and our initial reaction is to react to feed our disappointment and anger but like Joseph we will have to handle things quietly. Don't be afraid of looking weak, but know that The Lord honors men who protect others more than they protect their ego.

By his decision, Joseph put aside his ego and pride, and prioritized the safety of a woman he believed had betrayed him. Joseph showed us that to be a man we must embody godly maturity. Although, he no longer planned to go through with the marriage, Joseph felt responsible for the well-being of this woman and her unborn child, and to avoid adding stress to an already messy situation. 

Today, our world is in need of men who are willing to put aside their ego, sacrifice their comfort, and get off of their high horse, in order to care for the needs of those around them. Look around. Who are the people who need you? How can you be more mature and responsible today?

Unwrap the man in you

John 8;31-32,38

“What does it mean to be a man?” Some will argue that your manhood is based on what you do for a living, or having a certain number of sexual partners, or being "strong" and not showing emotions, or knowing what to do in all situations, or being able to protect and provide for your family, some say it's just a label. Depending on who you ask, you might get a different combination of these or an emphasis on a few over others.

Nevertheless, God's Word shows us a clear picture of what it means to be a man. It is first and foremost important to know that manhood isn't a final destination, but an ongoing journey. With each passing moment, we have the ability to grow into the men God has called us to be.

To the Jews who believed him, Jesus said, “If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free” John 8:31-32. The freedom Jesus speaks of requires some unlearning; unlearning a lot of things we think we know about manhood, in order to make room for the truth He set in motion from the very beginning. 

Jesus goes on to share that He learned the truth He shares from His Father (John 8:38).

 In order to make room for the Father’s teaching, we must do away with some of the “lessons from our fathers” (media, music, society, culture, well-intending models with misguided information, etc.) If there was ever a time for men to heal from the sickness of false ideologies, it's now. Let's dive in and unwrap the man in you!

Make Disciples

Mathew 28:18-20

 The Great Commission is simple in nature, yet difficult in execution.

Matthew 28 clearly tells us that we are called to make disciples and that we have the power of the Holy Spirit to accomplish this mission. Leaders recognize this charge and embrace it with reverence.

Never hide or be ashamed of your Savior. God wants you to hold your head high and be ready to share your testimony with others. Wherever you are in life, whatever your past is, God is ready to use you right where you are. Look in the mirror and see the man that God has called to be a witness so that He might save others.

You must own this and always be looking for opportunities to share the Good News of Jesus with others. As a spiritual leader of your home, one of the most powerful things your family can see is how on fire for Jesus you are. Your service of others will show them how seriously you take the Great Commission to heart. Be the leader you are intended to be by serving God every day as you lead your family and others to the wonderful salvation that is found only in Jesus.

Question to Consider

What effect does the Gospel have on your life?

Do you love others enough to share the Gospel so they can be saved from an eternity separated from God?

What actions will you commit to today to be the leader God intends you to be?

Spiritual Mentors

1 Peter 5 :1-3

Mentors are important in all walks of life.

Spiritually speaking, finding a mentor can be the best step you can take to grow as a spiritual leader of your family. 1 Peter 5 tells how elders have so much wisdom to share and it behooves us to seek out that counsel to grow in our walk. So, how do you find spiritual mentors?

You first need to know what to look for in a man before you ask them to speak into your life. What you need to be looking for is the fruit of their life. Do they treat others and walk in a way that showcases love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control? That should be prevalent in everything they do.

Once you feel they would be a solid mentor, have the courage to ask him to speak into your life. This can be intimidating. If you have selected the right man, they will treat such a request with kindness and humility. If they say, “I’m not sure if I’m qualified,” that’s a good indicator you are on the right path!

Once found, a spiritual mentor is someone you can go to on a regular schedule or as needed for guidance with your walk. It could be weekly or as infrequent as quarterly. The main thing is that you have a direct line to a man of God that is willing to take the time and speak into your life. Take this step as of absolute importance and seek out a spiritual mentor to help you grow.

 Question to Consider

What characteristics do you look for in a spiritual mentor?

How visible is your fruit if others wanted to seek you out as their mentor?

What actions will you commit to today to be the leader God intends you to be?